Paul and Jon "Two peas in a pod"

Paul Hanley, "never needed a Big Brother (he has one)," he also grew up in a family, "where my dad was there all the time. And my dad was a mentor for other kids too." Because of the example that his father set Paul was interested in becoming a mentor himself. Paul thought about being a Big Brother for about six years before really making the connection. He was taking college courses in Bath when he met Connie Hartley the current Executive Director during a volunteer recruitment day at University College Bath/Brunswick, "and she wanted me in," he laughed, "so that's how I really found out about it (the program)."

Paul's volunteerism with Big Brothers Big Sisters started out in the School-Based Mentoring Program at Bath Middle School. This program matches children with mentors to spend time in a one-to-one friendship and meet once weekly during the school day. School-Based matches share lunch, play games and talk. In this program meetings take place during on-site sessions at the child's school only. Paul was matched with his Little Brother Jon in January of 2006, at the time Jon was in the seventh grade. Paul remembers being nervous to meet Jon. Jon gave Paul a tour of the middle school and then they went outside to play basketball. "My dad was a superintendant of schools, he did some of his best mentoring on the basketball court," Paul shared. Paul and Jon continued meeting at Bath Middle School for two years.

Their friendship had grown. They became interested in spending time outside of the school setting. In June of 2007 the friends transitioned into the Community-Based program. Jon shared that when he was first matched with Paul, "he was hoping for a Big Brother who was cool, someone to get him out of the house because he was always playing on the computer and being lazy," he wanted to spend time with someone active. The first activity that they experienced together was riding Paul's Trikes on the Brunswick bike path. They tried playing tennis but Jon didn't take to it very easily, a topic that they both laugh about now. They then transitioned from tennis to racquet ball at the YMCA, "it's a great way to blow off steam," they both agreed.

Over time the activities have changed. "We do a lot of recycling," Paul shared, "I am teaching Jon the power of the free nickel," they laughed. Jon has a vested interest in computers. He obtains a computer that already works and cleans out the operating system. Or if he gets a hold of a computer that doesn't work he tries to figure out what is wrong with it. "I've put together three already," Jon said, "That's also called troubleshooting," Paul added. Paul is a self proclaimed "scrounger," he tracks down old computers that people aren't using and gives them to Jon to practice on, "I'm learning about this stuff from Jon and helping him out by finding computer parts." This summer the friends are spending a lot of time cutting lawns and talking. "He's fifteen, it's good honest work, and Jon likes it," Paul said. Cutting lawns provides a good way to learn the value of working for your pay.

Jon and Paul have been through a lot together. Paul shared that, "Jon was there when my Dad died and Jon was also there when I was diagnosed with cancer," two subjects that the friends maintain an open communication about. "Also, to see him (Jon) come from wanting to look at the TV screen all the time to wanting to go outside once in awhile is great. He's a future capitalist in the making, he is a go-getter, he has goals and wants to make money and I like that," Paul said. Jon likes Paul because, "He's just a cool cat from start to finish," Jon said. "We like getting together and we are a good combination, two peas in a pod type of thing." Jon likes that they can talk about anything and it doesn't really matter (the topic). The friends maintain a comfortable and respectful relationship.

Paul concluded by saying, "You know I talk to a lot of adults, but it's good sometimes to just converse on a kid, they are a lot less judgmental. Like I talk to my brother a lot, or even you (BBBS staff), you know and everyone has an opinion. Jon says a lot of things like, you know I feel ya man, and that's it, and sometimes that's just what I need to hear, you don't really need an answer." Then Jon piped in, "It's the same thing when I talk to Paul, I can be venting about something and he doesn't really judge or say things like, well you should have done this or that, he's just really cool."

Paul would like to share that Big Brothers Big Sisters is a good program if someone wanted to give it a try. "It doesn't change my life that much (as far as schedule and activities) we spend about an hour or two a week hanging out together. We pretty much wing it week to week and have no concrete plans for this summer," although the friends do plan to mow a lot of grass.

There is an immediate need for Big Brothers in the Community-Based program, 25 boys are currently waiting for a friend. Volunteers are also needed for the School-Based program. If you are interested in these rewarding volunteer opportunities and want to support a child in need, please contact Aurora Joseph at the Big Brothers Big Sisters of Bath/Brunswick office: 729-7736 ex: 16 or email: community@bbbsbathbrun.org.